Is This Normal?
The chaos that is the KerbersArchive for marriage
Doing taxes
This is going to sound very bizarre to many, but I love doing our taxes. I know, I know, it’s a very weird thing to hear…especially from someone who has a severe aversion to math. But I use Turbo Tax to do ours, and it’s so easy and awesome. I just have to get all of the documents organized, plug in the numbers, and then watch our refund numbers grow with every deduction I put in. It’s awesome.
I have been itching to start them, but we hadn’t gotten my W2 from ISU yet, so it was pretty much impossible to begin. That finally came today, so tonight I got started. An hour and a half later they’re done, and Dave and I are thrilled with our return number. We don’t have anything super specific to spend it on this year, so I think we’re going to start our Disney trip fund. We’re hoping to go in October, so if we can put that money in the bank and add to it a bit before then we should be in good shape to go. I know there is probably someone reading this who will try to argue with me about how declaring zero on our W4s is a bad idea because we’re giving the government an interest free loan. I’ve heard it all before. the truth is, I know we wouldn’t have saved as much as this refund is, so I still feel like we’re ahead. There’s not much like a bunch of money showing up in your bank account…and in about 10 days, that’s what we’ll get. Love it!
The best birthday dinners
We have really appreciated one of the biggest benefits of living with Aunt Theresa in the last week. Dave and I were actually able to go out to dinner together the day after my birthday last week (only because I had class on my actual birthday) and tonight for his birthday. Because Theresa agreed to put the kids to bed for us, we didn’t have to go somewhere quick, we didn’t have to keep our eyes on the time, and we didn’t have to worry about getting home and then fighting through bedtime. Instead, we got to go to two nice restaurants that we don’t frequent very often, enjoy some great food, and enjoy having a couple of drinks on a weeknight. Most importantly, we got to spend some quality time together and to truly enjoy each other’s company. I wish that we got to do this more often, but I’m really glad that we did it last week and tonight. Spending alone and quality time with Dave is truly the best birthday celebration I could ask for.
A short getaway–day 1
Once we knew that we’d be living with Aunt Theresa for a time before closing on our new house, we decided that it would be smart to make plans to get away on the weekends as much as possible. Not only is it good for us to have some time to ourselves, I’m sure that Aunt Theresa appreciates having her house to herself again for a time, too. So this weekend we decided to head to Chicago for a quick overnight trip.
We started out after Ben’s soccer game yesterday, and we got up to the ‘burbs around 3:00. That was just enough time for us to go to the Morton Arboretum in Lisle. I’ve driven by that place a billion times and have wanted to visit for years, so this was the perfect opportunity for us. It was an absolutely gorgeous day…warm, but not too hot, and there were beautiful blue skies with white fluffy clouds floating around. We wandered around enjoying the weather by taking in all the flowers, plants and scenery.
This place was right up our alley…there was just so much nature around us to explore. We even saw a hummingbird hovering near a flowering bush in one of the staged areas. It was cool for the kids to see that. They were both super surprised at how quickly those wings were moving! After walking around for quite a while, we found Emma’s own personal heaven…a little creek that was built specifically for kids to wade in and move rocks around. Both kids had their shoes off instantly and were in that water quicker than quick. They absolutely loved it.
We spent a lot of time in that stream. But we finally dragged the kids out so we could go to the shrubbery maze. There is a treehouse in the middle of the maze, and the kids were very anxious to get up there and see the view of the entire thing. Dave navigated, and we made it to the steps of the treehouse in no time.
There was just one more thing we had to do before we left. We spotted a big hill when we were up in the treehouse, and the kids desperately wanted to run to the top of it. They ran up, ran down, and then we convinced them to run up again so they could roll down it. It was big fun.
We truly loved this place. By the time we left the kids were hungry and exhausted, which is always a sign of a good day. We headed to downtown Naperville for some dinner and then went back to our hotel for some swimming. By the time the kids finally fell asleep, Dave and I were exhausted, too. But we were not too exhausted to thoroughly enjoy the luxury of a King size bed. We both cracked up at how big it seemed now that we’re back in a Full size at Theresa’s. It felt like we were miles apart in that thing. We can’t wait to get our bed back!
This was a super full-of-fun day. We went to bed eagerly anticipating the next one.
The sweetest birthday cards ever
Dave took the kids to pick out birthday cards for me. I had to scan them to post here because they are just the sweetest cards ever.
This is Emma’s card. The front is on the left and the inside is on the right:
She was super excited because, “Mommy, it means that you’re a pwincess on yuh buhfday!!” This was also the first time that she has ever written our last name.
This is Ben’s card. Again, the front is on the left and the inside is on the right:
He cracked himself up because I don’t like cats. He didn’t even understand how funny it is because of the street slang, he just liked that it had a cat on it. Gotta love 6 year-old innocence.
I absolutely love that they both picked out their cards special for me. I also love that they both signed their last name…just in case I can’t remember who Ben and Emma are someday, I guess. Mostly I love how excited they were to give them to me this morning. I hope they never lose that giving spirit.
Leaving our house
Tonight we finished hauling the last of our stuff out of the house and we cleaned it all up so it’s ready for the closing tomorrow. The last thing I did was mop the kitchen floor and vacuum the family room.
After I loaded the vacuum and mop into the car, I went back in to look around. It was a bit emotional for me to see the place totally empty. I was taken back seven years, when Dave and I walked into the empty house after our first closing. We had been married less than two weeks, and really had no idea what we were getting into. As I looked around all of the memories we’d had in that house came flooding back. I vividly remembered some of the changes that we had made there…painting many of the rooms before we ever moved in, putting up our first Christmas tree and decorations, painting the nursery, painting Ben’s big boy room when I was pregnant with Emma, putting the play set in the backyard, working hours and hours finishing the basement, hauling many truckloads of rock into our landscaping, and replacing fixtures and ceiling fans all over the house. But even more I remember all of the things that took place there…telling Dave I was pregnant with Ben, celebrating our first Christmas together, eating the top of our wedding cake on our first anniversary, bringing Ben home from the hospital and struggling through that first night, playing with both babies for hours on the floor of the family room, bringing Emma home from the hospital and laughing about how much easier it was this time, struggling to survive that first summer as a mother of two, watching the kids play outside with our neighbors for hours, decorating our house for holidays, and hosting all of our family and friends there many, many times. There were so many laughs and tears in that house over seven years. It was truly a home for us.
But now it’s time to move on. Dave and I are both confident that we will make our new house into a wonderful home for our family, too. We will never lose the memories we had at 1520 Augusta, and it will always have a special place in my heart.
The seven year itch?
Nope, not here! Today is Dave and my 7th anniversary, and I can honestly say that I’m more in love with him now than I was seven years ago. Now, I see what a great dad he is, and I value that in ways I could not have understood before. Now, I know all of his little idiosyncracies, and I know how to deal with them without fighting over them (most of the time). Now, I appreciate the many things he does to make my life more satisfying and enjoyable. The most recent example of that is the support he’s giving me to do more social things with my friends. I am regularly attending a Girls Night once a month and have joined a book club that meets once every other month. He never questions why I want to go…just tells me to have fun.
I cannot imagine my life without Dave in it. Sure, we bicker…and sometimes we bicker a lot. But we really do have fun together and we really, really like being together. I want to make him happy and he wants to make me happy. Fundamentally, I think that far outweighs any petty little arguments we have.
Here’s to many more anniversaries with you, Daver. I love you deeply and I think my life is better because you’re my partner.
Date night
After a long week of transitioning to our summer schedule, working on our garage sale, and a lot of bickering, Dave and I both wanted to have a night that we could spend some time with each other. So we called on Aunt Theresa, and as always, she happily had the kids come over to her house. I seriously don’t know what we’d do without Aunt Theresa. The kids absolutely love going over there and spending time with her. It’s awesome.
As we drove over to her house, Emma asked why we wouldn’t be staying there with them. “Well, Daddy and I are going on a date,” I said.
“What’s a date?” asked Ben.
“Well,” I said, “A date is when Mommy and Daddy want to go somewhere by themselves so they can spend some time together and talk. Before we had kids we went on dates all the time.”
“But when you-uh awe they-uh you just tawk like gwon-ups awways do?” asked Emma incredulously.
“Yep,” I said. “Doesn’t that sound like fun?”
“No,” Emma said emphatically. “Dat is not fun at AWL!!”
Dave and I looked at each other and chuckled. I was so looking forward to having a dinner where we could talk without interruption or without continuously getting up to refill milk or get treats for kids who cleared their plate. It’s funny how important little things like 2 hours of talk time become when you’re a parent. I really wish we would do it more often.
No matter what Emma thinks…I cherish the Date Night.
The wedding
This afternoon our nephew Scott got married. We took the kids to the wedding, which was not my first choice at all. I was sure that they would be antsy and bored, and those two are a deadly combination. I couldn’t have been more wrong. The kids were so good that it made the day quite enjoyable. In fact, Ben was pretty fascinated with the whole process. He had a million questions and comments about everything that was happening. It helped that the ceremony was outside…they didn’t have to be as quiet as they would have been indoors. It helped that there were crayons and coloring books waiting for the kids at our table. Those entertained both Ben and Emma for a long time while we were waiting for the reception to start. It also helped that there was a whole lotta running room on the dance floor for them to run around before they had to sit still for dinner.
Overall, I have to say that it was a very different wedding experience than I’ve ever had before. Being on Mommy duty is so different from just worrying about your own good time. 
I was so proud of the kids, though. They looked so sweet in their dress clothes and their behavior actually matched their look. I really could not have asked for more from them both. As we were leaving Emma even said, “Can we go to a wedding again real soon?” That’s quite a testament.
I hope that Scott and Margie had a perfect day, because everything seemed to go perfectly for them. It’s always great to celebrate a wedding…especially with your family. Here’s to many years together!
Daddy’s birthday
Today is my best friend and husband Dave’s birthday. I woke him up with some extra kisses this morning, and I told him that I wished he didn’t have to work on his birthday. If only there was a way for me to give that to him for a present…I would never have to shop again! But since it’s a Tuesday it was status quo, which meant I got to see him for about 10 minutes before I had to leave for work. So sad. The worst part was that I didn’t get to see his reaction to the gifts the kids had gotten him. Yesterday we went to the dollar store to shop, and they picked out some great gifts. Emma chose two glasses and Ben was super excited to find a car washing sponge for him. I knew that Dave would totally appreciate them because he had taken the kids to the very same dollar store to pick out my gifts. It’s important to us that they understand that giving gifts is way more important than getting them, so we’re starting now.
Anyway, Dave got to open his gifts with the kids before he went to work. After he got home, he took the kids out to his mom & dad’s, where Aunt Theresa joined them for a birthday dinner. Sadly, I couldn’t be with him then, either, because it’s Tuesday, so I had class.
Overall, it feels like I barely got to pamper Dave or celebrate with him at all. That makes me sad, but hopefully he knows how much I wish it could be different. I wish that we could always go somewhere the week between our birthdays so we could celebrate both of them like we should. Someday, Sweetheart…someday.
For now…happy birthday, my love. I’m so happy I got to spend another year of your life knowing and loving you.
A party for the P’s
Today was a huge family event…my parents’ 50th anniversary party. Their anniversary isn’t really until October, but since it would be virtually impossible for the Florida Athertons to come then, we scheduled it when they’d be in Sycamore this summer. It seems like yesterday when we were in Florida for Mom’s birthday and we first started talking about this party, but here we are and now it’s over.
The planning was a bit of a challenge with all three kids living in different places, but Nancy and Rod really did a great job coordinating everything. They hosted the party, and since they had just thrown Ryan’s graduation party last year, they are big party experts and had everything under control. The weather cooperated, too, which is shocking for one of our family events! We had good food, great friends and family there, and a whole lot of fun.
Before the party started, we all gathered for some family pictures. They’re always treasured since we’re usually all together only once a year.
Then we gave Grandma & Grandpa their gift, which was a canvas print of all the grandkids at Venice Beach. We took the original picture when we were all there for Christmas last year. We framed it so it would fit perfectly in their condo in Venice.
Once the people started arriving, it was full on eating, drinking, and mingling. There was a bags tournament, a couple of rounds of Bocce ball, and even a quick volleyball game. Everyone seemed to have a great time.
I truly can’t imagine it being a better day for any of us. My parents seemed really happy seeing old friends and having all of their family come celebrate with them. Fifty years of marriage is truly a remarkable milestone, and it deserves a big celebration. I’m really happy we could give our parents that. They’ve had a wonderful life together so far, and I know there’s a lot more ahead.
